Ah, Capri

The most famous hotel on the island is the Quisisana. It literally looks like it was decorated from Grandmother’s garage sale before she moved to assisted living. White and gold furniture, flowered bedspreads and coffee tables with fake columns. All of this would be absolutely fine if it was 1970. On the positive side, it is tranquil, immaculately clean, and has a nice garden right in the middle of the touristy hordes of Capri’s pedestrian alleys. So if you need to be in the heart of the action and have money to burn, the Hotel Quisisana will suit perfectly. If you don’t have mobility issues and bad design is bothersome then the so-called “Quisi” will not work…It is a bit like being stuck in a late 60’s Capri time warp minus the chic of Jackie Onassis and the humor of Austin Powers.

A bit farther from town is their two sister properties, the Casa Morgana and the Scalinatella. These are mini-versions of the Quisisana design theorem – including, and I jest not, a blackamoor draped with pearl at the doorway of the Scalinatella. One wonders at the political correctness of it all. On the bright side, the private terraces off the rooms in both hotels are gorgeous sparkling clean, with calendar perfect views of Capri and the sea beyond. In the shiny white and blue tile, potted plants and slating arrangements in each private balcony there is much to be admired. The problem for me is the price – high season rates run from 700 to 1300 euros for these accommodations at the Casa Morgana and Scalinatella. I cannot imagine what the Hotel Quisisana charges, nor do I want to know. If these were three star hotels with three star pricing, I could recommend them without reservation. However, views and charm alone do not compensate for the design issues and cramped quarters.

J.K. Place, not in the town of Capri, but by the harbor, has similar pricing with stunning design and views, extraordinary service, a beach, a spa, and a full sized pool. I don’t know what I am missing, but there seems like no comparison. Again, I suppose there are those who wish to be within shouting distance of Lacoste and Prada, but with balconies with stunning sea views, a swimmable beach, great pool area, and décor reminiscent of a private house in the Hamptons with Italian flair, why wouldn’t you stay there?

The staff is attired in light blue seersucker jackets (like an Aman resort, you never sign a bill), the rooms have a complimentary mini-bar, ample storage space, great lighting, and terrific bath products.